Yeah,that question always leads you back to.. Learn, Love and Multiply.. theres no way around it,  i see it as it is certain we are born, and it is certain that we die, what we find in the gap between those poles is what we prefer to call our chance/chances.. but because of our uniqueness of individual existence, only one thing happens and thats the uncertainty of our destiny, being us as we are, though all things are possible..

ultimate fate and destiny we cannot control, it would be like predicting the future.. BUT we can MAKE our fate and our destiny be as what we want to call it.. example "it is my destiny to marry and have children" and that happens you marry have children, or "it was fate that mr right literally walked right in my life in starbucks that day" being all things possible, then these examples are possible fate and destiny, but mr right could of been the next man in, through what we beleive.. controlled thought, process of reasons, individual preferences, and most importantly time so we'll tend to overlook all options  of chances, fate and destiny.. i beleive we do have a choice and play a role somewhere someway somehow in our destiny, of course we can change our plan of destiny, but not our true born destiny thats the one thing thats gonna happen