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satansmuff
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« on: October 26, 2009, 02:39:14 PM » |
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Hey guys, I had no idea when I made the slightest mention of my problems at how many people would reply and genuinely seem to care, so I decided to post an update...Well just got back a few mins ago, I live in the Richmond Va. area and "he" lives in the D.C. area.....about a 2 hour drive, well nothing really happened at all today mind you this is the first court date since I got the papers.....At court he tried to have my boyfriend thrown out of the room...you know, they guy that 100% supports his child...yeah, that guy..[lol, she's 13 and he has been paying me $40 a week for the past 2 years in child support, I can't even feed the dogs for a week with that].....AND he tried to have my lawyer tossed off the case also, claiming a conflict of interest since my lawyer is my mothers boyfriend...Thankfully he didn't get either of his request and my lawyer requested to have the case be heard in Richmond.....OMG, what a joke, the judge said that would be appropiate since that is where me and the child live and he was stupid enough to say to the judge..."I object to that, it would be a 2 hour drive for me if you moved it" Hello.....like it's not a 2 hour drive for us PLUS our child would have to miss school if we have to go up there because there is no way of telling what time we would be able to make it back home....Needless to say it was indeed moved....it really amazes me at how he claims he wants what is best for her when all that comes out of his mouth is me,me,me.....oh poor baby doesn't want to drive down here for court, but it's ok for his kid to keep missing school [that is if his dumb ass even thought about us not being able to make it home before she would get out of school] and sorry I'm not gonna go out of town and let her be at home by herslef without knowing when I might be back..... ...oh and in mediation [which went nowhwere] it was the mediators suggestion to try visitation first just to give our daughter the chance to build a relationship and maybe try to earn her trust and to finish the school year so she doesn't have to switch schools after she already started [he has been absent the majority of her life].....he looked right at the lady and simply said "Nope, I want it all right now" all as in physical and legas custody........how is that having someones best interest at heart, all I'm hearing is what he wants.....like I said...me,me,me and not a second thought as to how she would feel about anything!!! Uggg this is sooo frustrating, I know I'm not perfect and I have had legal problems of my own, which are in the past and put behind me, but that is the only thing he has in his favor so, I wonder where he's getting the idea that this is gonna work out for him, he's been gone most of her life, by his choice not mine although his wife likes to claim that I'm the one who keeps her away BULLSHIT, he's barely paid anything for her, oh and 2 years ago HE SIGNED HER OVER TO ME, EVERYTHING! forgot to mention that last little tid-bit lol!!!
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lagunagirl
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« Reply #1 on: October 26, 2009, 02:43:11 PM » |
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thanks for the update. I actually was just thinking about you and just tried to figure out where to post to find out how it went.
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genenco
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« Reply #2 on: October 26, 2009, 02:48:13 PM » |
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I'm sorry if I missed part 1. But it sounds like that guy needs a swift kick you know where  Strange how it can be someone suddely wants to be "Daddy" again after so long. I'm glad the judge saw good reason to move it closer to you. Keep the chin and dukes up SM. 
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CURTSONLYLOVE1
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« Reply #3 on: October 26, 2009, 03:08:50 PM » |
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well satan, i am glad things worked out for u so far...its good that it will be in ur state...do u dont have to travel...i am glad u posted because i was just starting to wonder how things went for u today...
what i dont understand is if he gave up his rights 2 years ago, what is it he wants now? doesnt he know that speaks for itself..
anyhoot, good luck things r turning around....now hit them damn slots...lol
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A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at them..!!!!!
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blueday
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« Reply #4 on: October 26, 2009, 03:21:13 PM » |
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Im sorry to hear your terribly traumatic time of it satan, I truly hope all works out exactly as it should i.e. your daughter stays with you.
He sounds like a prize idiot. Why the interest all of sudden - is it monetary cos thats generally what its all about over here.
Do keep us posted.
blue
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wintermare
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« Reply #5 on: October 26, 2009, 03:23:28 PM » |
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Any chance its because him and the new wifey cant have kids? Ive seen that one before, suddenly taking an interest because its cheaper than adopting. I feel you are a good parent as you have not mentioned how you feel but hpw your daughter would feel and if she is in a safe family enviroment then there is no reason at all to give him custody.
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satansmuff
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« Reply #6 on: October 26, 2009, 03:24:49 PM » |
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Geneco, funny how you said that, he went from being father of the year [well not really, but he was a decent father] from birth until we broke up when she was 3, to NON-EXISTANT from 3-11, to in and out from 11 till now, and you really nailed it with SUDDEN.....mentioned nothing at all to me or her about it, just get a kock on the door from the sheriff one day out of the blue! And to everyone else, thank you guys so much for caring.....it's a huge relief to be able to talk about this and vent a little, so thank you guys for being here for me!
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mamrone
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« Reply #7 on: October 26, 2009, 03:59:19 PM » |
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Try to find out what his motive is why now does he want tax benefits??? there has to be a reason. And, don't let him know it bothers you that's half the battle and put it in God's hands he is the Best Judge of all Good Luck i will Pray for you
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SLOT JUNKIE!!!
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« Reply #8 on: October 26, 2009, 05:00:24 PM » |
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Satan, this is good, you won the first hearing  It might not feel like a win, but it is! I believe the judge is gonna see right thru him and he will be lucky to get SUPERVISED visits...
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***** Never take the BLAME or the CREDIT for something you did not do*****
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satansmuff
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« Reply #9 on: October 26, 2009, 05:03:09 PM » |
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in response to wintermare, no, that is not the reason they already have 2 children together, ones 7 and the others under a year old..........but I agree with the last post, I think it has something to do with money and YES a tax return......we almost came to an arrangement until he was told he wouldn't recieve the "pyhsical title" and you have to have physical in order to claim them on your taxes....he was really pushing the whole joint physical custody until the mediator told him it was impossible since we live over 100 apart and in order to have joint she has to live both places eual amounts of time....his suggestion to that??? He takes her everysingle weekend, every single holiday, every single school break including summers......so he just said he wants to take away every birthday party, sleepover, girls night out, basically her entire life outside of school so he can have that title................hmmmmmm you tell me what he's after!!
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drpsyce38
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« Reply #10 on: October 26, 2009, 05:59:52 PM » |
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What a messy ordeal.
Keep in mind somethings about family law in the Commonwealth of Virginia.
First, the legal burden HE has to change a custody arrangement of a 13 year old is HUGE. He would have to prove your daughter is completely better with him than you. Unless you have fellony convictions for violence, drugs, etc., the odds are highly against him.
Second, and related to above. This will cost him a great deal of money to carry it through to a hearing or trial. And then, the odds are still against his wishes here. He will have to fork out $1000s to get move this along.
Third, your daughter will have a lot of say so in who she wish to live with.
Praying for you! Just keep hanging in there.
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mamrone
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« Reply #11 on: October 26, 2009, 06:06:44 PM » |
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Hey i just rembered something i had two teenage daughters Hummmmmm!!! It's all coming back to me you might just want to lose cause believe me i would rather raise ten teenage boys (i had two of them as well)over one teenage daughter and then when she turns 20 take her back she'll will be normal again LOL sorry i just had to get that in to make you laugh
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satansmuff
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« Reply #12 on: October 26, 2009, 08:07:43 PM » |
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ok, I've got to be 100% honest in order to get 100% honest input, Dr. I got have 1 mistormenaor [spell check there lol] for a petty larsony that happened almost a year ago, other than that in 28 years that is the only thing on my record, and he did try to bring that up in mediation! She told him when he brought that up that , that was the past and we are focused on her present and the future and told him well both of us to stop trying to dig up past events!
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wnanhee
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« Reply #13 on: October 26, 2009, 08:25:01 PM » |
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Hey i just rembered something i had two teenage daughters Hummmmmm!!! It's all coming back to me you might just want to lose cause believe me i would rather raise ten teenage boys (i had two of them as well)over one teenage daughter and then when she turns 20 take her back she'll will be normal again LOL sorry i just had to get that in to make you laugh
I have one teenage girl who is 15 going on 35...I have full custody and believe me it is not easy to raise her but not even once I regret that I have her and not my ex. who has no clue to what so ever on rasing a child...not to mention that he only thinks about rasing kid is all about money. If it were not for my daughter, I wouldn't be here who I am...proud to be who I am as a woman, but most of all, a mother...she taught me so much...she is the gift from God. I would not want any ten boys who are perfect, and who will give me no heartache, none is better than my rebellious daughter. She made to be goof, honest, strong...as a single mother, life hasn't been always easy and I also raised my younger brother who is in medical school, at the same time... I didn't have to fight for custody with my ex. since he wanted nothing to do with his daughter but still it was all so worthy...
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« Last Edit: October 26, 2009, 08:39:24 PM by wnanhee »
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*** Well behaved women rarely make history. ***
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drpsyce38
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« Reply #14 on: October 26, 2009, 08:30:46 PM » |
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The petty larceny means ZERO. Don't worry about that.
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