Dealing With Life Threatening Illness.........

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Last post made 8 years ago by bingocrazy48
Lipstick
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  • Lipstick
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  • Hiya LCB'ers,

    Finding out you or someone you know has cancer or any other life threatening illness is devastating news. I have a good friend i grew up with that has brain cancer at the age of 28. Her prognosis is not good. She is close to stage 4 cancer. Chemo has not worked and she is now on radiation 4 times a week.

    She first learned she had colon cancer (very rare for her age group) last October and the doctors said they successfully removed it. Unfortunately it had already spread (secondary cancer) to her brain. They discovered in July three tumors at the brain stem that is inoperable. One unbelievable thing about this is i had a psychic party at the house in October. The psychic immediately told her she had brain cancer and there is four tumors in the brain. My friend told her no, there is only three and the psychic persisted saying tell the doctor they missed one and that is on the other side of her brain. One month later the doctors discovered it.

    The purpose of this thread is to express the amazing strength she has. She does not have a pity party for herself and through it all is one of the most brave people i have ever met in my life. I have often thought if i was diagnosed with something like this i would roll up in a ball and rock in a corner somewhere.

    She continues to work full time. Goes out and enjoys life doing everything she did before she got sick and is a tower of strength. She is starting to lose her hair from the aggressive radiation treatments and docs told her she will most likely not be able to have children now.

    Please say a prayer for her recovery and that she continues to stay as strong as she is.

    If you were diagnosed with a life threatening illness or had one how would you or did you deal with it?

  • Pray a lot and try to treat others how i want to be treated. I try not to think about the what ifs because it is just too depressing.  mostly try to make others smile or lend them an ear when they need comfort. I am not big on posting the negative side to anything just focusing on my passion which is currently gambling lol. I refuse to lay down and be sick i will enjoy life to the fullest.

  • It's a tough situation and she definitely is stronger than anyone I've ever met. If it were me I can't say what I would do but in situations that are bad, really bad, we tend to find strength that we never knew we had.


  • Pray a lot and try to treat others how i want to be treated. I try not to think about the what ifs because it is just too depressing.  mostly try to make others smile or lend them an ear when they need comfort. I am not big on posting the negative side to anything just focusing on my passion which is currently gambling lol. I refuse to lay down and be sick i will enjoy life to the fullest.


    That's a wonderful outlook Rena and a great big hug to you for you thought provoking inspiration.

    @froggy - i think your right. When you think you can't possibly endure a bad situation you find strength you never thought you had.
  • Very inspiring, it amazes me how people do cope, my thoughts are with your friend at this time and it is amazing the strength she is showing, i lost a friend who was just in his early 40's too from liver disease after he already had one liver transplant, he then did so well staying away from the bad naughty stuff for a few years, then all off a sudden he just started drinking again, and he then messed his new liver up.

    I also lost my granddad 2 weeks ago from cancer too, he never smoked in his life, it turned out it was caused by asbestos when he was younger - but he actually died from the complications of pneumonia due to the lungs damaged from the cancer in his sleep.

    Life can be cruel a lot of times to the wrong people at times too, and we just have to make the most of it, it is all we can do, we are on this earth for such a tiny tiny amount of time, and life is cruel, but it is inspiring how strong your friend is, stay strong, thoughts with you and your friend.

  • I first like to say I'm sorry to her about your friend that is awful. She will be in my prayers and she sounds like a great inspiration to those dealing with an illness. I honestly don't know how I would act, I would want to stay strong and live my life to the fullest.

  • Hi Lips,  First I would like to say I 'm sorry about your friend,  just the word cancer scares the life out of everyone. I have posted before that I am batteling breast cancer since 2011, I have had 22 chemo treatments. And 38 radiation. Treatments,  had both my breasts. Removed. All I can say is,  that if it wasn't. For my family and friends around me, I don't. Think I could be this strong. Just be the friend you've. Always been and love them the same. I will say a prayer.

    DreamRJ, I'm sorry for the loss of your granddad.

  • That is as tough as it gets, having to deal with something like this at the age of 28... I have no idea what I would do in such a situation, staying strong and trying to lead a normal life sounds like the best option but it's a lot easier said than done.

    My thoughts are with your friend Lips, I hope she will somehow go through this and live a long happy life.

  • So sorry to hear about your friend Lips.  That really is so sad to read and for someone so young, it makes it even harder to take in.  I am totally gobsmacked that she still works full time and continues living her life to the fullest.  She really is an incredibly strong person by the sound of it.  How would I cope - I have no idea but I would not lay down and die that's for sure.

    My thoughts are with your friend - I hope her strong will power and determination beats this thing and thank you for sharing such a personal story.

  • Thanks everyone for your kind encouraging words and prayers. I'll keep everyone updated as time goes on..........

    Lips

  • I went to see her last night.................

    The radiation is starting to show the wear and tear on her body. She has lost patches of hair where the radiation has been targeted on both sides of her head. When i got there her voice was very hoarse and i asked if she was getting a cold she said no, she just got through throwing up from the meds.

    She went to the doc yesterday and there is no good news........one of the tumors grew the other three remained the same size.

    What astonishes me is she is still remarkably up beat. Her outlook is "i know i will beat this". She has radiation 4 times a week every time she goes there is a 13 year old boy that gets a treatment too that she has befriended. She said he is incredibly strong and has brain cancer like her. He cracks jokes and tells her it ain't all really that bad.

    Yesterday when she went in for her radiation the boy was not there. So she asked one of the nurses where is he today? He passed away during the night she was told.............sigh.

    I am thinking of running a local fund raiser in the neighborhood for her because she said the meds are so expensive and her insurance only covers partial so she pays like an extra $400 a week. Somebody suffering with this kind of illness certainly doesn't need the stress of money hanging over their head.

    If anyone has any fund raising ideas please let me know i am open to suggestions. Please just let me note this is not plea for LCB pledges as it is strictly prohibited.

    Thanks,

    Lips

  • Thanks for the update,

    Sad and sorry to hear about that 13 year old your friend befriended sad

    Tell her to stay strong, my thoughts are with her.

  • That's so sad to read Lips.  Your poor friend and that poor 13 year old lad....he had such a short life....

    I hope your friend gets through this tough time.

    As for money raising ideas the GiveForward website seems to be a great way to raise cash for needy causes.

  • Raising funds for her is a great idea Lips, I was going to suggest Give Forward as well. Let me know if you start a fund raiser because I would like to contribute.

  • Update..........

    Her blood work results didn't look good so doctor wanted to run some tests to see if cancer spread. She was emotionally drained waiting for results but she kept up a strong front.

    Turns out there is a tumor in her stomach now and its not certain if its cancerous or not yet. One of her smaller tumors in the brain grew from 3.4 to 3.9 the other three have remained the same so that is a major concern. She is now on heavier doses of chemo and is still doing radiation. She feels real achy in her joints and that is mostly caused from the meds.

    She is still working although work has given her medical leave so anytime she needs to take off she can. Saw her over the weekend when she had a bbq at her house and it blows me away because her spirits are so up and she looks great. She never complains and if you ask how she is feeling she will always say "i am ok".

    Plan on seeing her on Easter Sunday and if there is any new news about her stomach tumor i will let everyone know.

    Sometimes it just helps to share with others and i am so grateful you are all supportive.

    Lips

  • Oh no, lips. 

    I am sorry your friend is going through all this and at only 28.

    I hope this may give you a little comfort.  My neighbor, at the age of 36, was diagnosed with stage 4 breast and stage 4 lung cancer.  Everyone braced for the worst.  She had a long battle of treatments, surgeries, chemo, etc.  It has been almost 4 years and she is cancer free! 
    The family home is up for sale,  They are moving to their cabin to enjoy life without all the hustle and bustle.

    I don't know if anyone has registered for an online support group.  Our neighbors did and Sarah would periodically type open letters to update what she was going through. 
    There was a sign up sheet for neighbors/friends to bring breakfast, lunch and dinners.  There was a basket kept on a table by the front door so we didn't need to ring the bell and disturb her.
    People dropped off books/movies/games. etc.

    Just a few ideas of ways the community can help.

  • So sorry to hear more bad news for your friend Lips. I hope you will soon be saying similar things to Gabby about how she made it through.

    Have a wonderful day together on Sunday xx

  • Well...............the worst words you ever want to hear from your doctor "there is really nothing more we could do" was what my friend was told.

    The four tumors in her brain continue to grow, chemo has steadily increased and steroid shot dosage has also increased with no positive results. She will go for a second opinion next week but not sure there is much left that any other doctor can suggest.

    Seems her body is resisting the drugs so time and hope are running out. Received the news yesterday morn and a group of us went to go see her last night. We brought a big care basket filled with all kinds of feel good stuff to spoil her. What is miraculous is her spirits are still up and she has determination and strength like no one i have ever imagined could have.

    It's past saying "you will beat this". So what do you say...........what do you say to a 29 year old girl and her husband?

    I almost feel guilty for feeling so devastated when her spirits are so in tacked. We all sat at her kitchen table, ate pizza, talked and laughed the evening away but underneath it all was an overwhelming feeling of extreme sadness and worry.

    She is strong so that her husband, family and friends stay strong. Its not about her but about everyone else and helping them to cope..........that's just the kind of person she is.

    Lips



  • How devastating Lips.  You're right - what can you say.

    She sounds like the most sellfless person ever, always thinking of others before thinking about herself.  All you can do is make the best of her remaining time, special times for you all to remember.  That said, with her fighting spirit and positivity, there always has to be hope, however futile it may be.

    I know how hard it is to deal with situations like this as I've been there in the past; I won't go into detail.  It's hard to smile and be positive when you know what you know.

    Take care and be strong for her which I'm sure you will be. xx

  • She is a dear friend to me too and I can't bring myself to even consider "remaining time". I've know her since childhood and it's confusing because her spirits are so good that you almost forget that she's sick. She lives her life so normally except for all these treatments. We're definitely past the point of telling her to be strong and ensuring her that she'll be ok especially when she senses that we're just trying to say something nice. With second and third opinions on the way in the coming weeks I'm still hopeful. Not quite time to give up yet. She certainly hasn't!

  • Lips and Froggy,I'm so sorry your dear friend is going thru this,she sounds like a remarkable woman.
    It is a difficult to know what to say or do but just be there as much as possible for her and her hubby!
    I'm so sorry you are all going thru this.You are all in my thoughts and prayers!

  • Thanks for your kind words Blue and Rose  smiley

    All you can do is put it on the back burner of your mind when you start to feel hope is slipping away. She and her hubby will be coming over for Memorial Day BBQ on Sunday and i am sure she will be lifting our spirits and i only hope we can measure up to that kind of strength.

    Lips

  • Update -

    She is at stage 4 cancer and taking the highest dose of radiation and chemo. Doc's found a tumor in her spine but caught it early enough that they are fairly certain it will shrink. She had a blood clot in her neck and treatment had to be stopped for while until it could be dissolved.

    Spirits still amazing.............and we all consider a bad day when it is raining or we lost at a casino or we can't find our other slipper or we owe a late fee for paying bill a day late.

  • Thanks for the update Lips.  Sorry to hear things have gotten worse for her.  I'm amazed her spirits are so good; she truly is an amazing person.

    I hope you are coping with this news ok, it must be hard for you to watch her suffering so much.

  • Your friend is truly an amazing person, going through all this and still staying strong is not something you see every day.

  • As of Friday February 13th the doctor announced she is in total remission! Right when you think there is no hope, yet you refuse to give up hope miracles happen!

    Thank you so much for all your kind words.

  • I'm really glad to hear the news Lips. There's a new life now for your friend.

  • You could knock me down with the a feather right now Lips.  That's amazing news.  I'm so thrilled for your friend and of course for her family and you.  What an excellent and I'll be totally honest, unexpected outcome.

  • Wow, now that's good news!

    I admit that I was afraid to open the topic when I noticed it was updated, I was afraid of bad news. Took a deep breath before opening it... That proves that your friend's courage is out of this world, she really deserves all the best that life has to offer.

  • That's wonderful news Lipstick and those na-sayers that say that there isn't a God. Just look at your friend as a great example of a miracle. I hope she continues to grow stronger each day. The C word, as my mother calls it ,has impacted most families in one way or another. No one can be prepared for such news. The only thing we can do is pay attention to the doctors and researchers, when they state that certain types of cancers are caused by known products. Stop using that product. YES I MEAN CIGARETTES! and everything else that has been in the news for the past 10 years. I have lost four family members in the last two years from 3 different type of cancer, all cause by cigarettes.  I know that we cant prevent the inevitable, but we don't have to help it along. One more thing, then I will shut-up(lol).
    Never stop laughing and communicating. Some of my most cherished memories are those that have occurred while caring or visiting a sick friend or family member. Illness has a funny way of not sugar coating the future. It is what it is. We are tested physically, mentally and emotionally. My favorite emotion is laughter thru tears, and until you have been sitting at a funeral, of a loved one, and someone knocks over a flower arrangement , into the organist , in which she screams  #$$&%*# over the intercom, you have no idea how laughter can heal the soul. Once again I am so happy for you and your friend. I will keep you both in my prayers.
    Have a great week!
    gl all
    imakin1

  • Such beautiful replies thank you so much....

  • Went for a check up, found a new tumor in the brain, cancer is back............

  • So sorry to read that Lips.  I hope she can fight this one and get through it again.

  • Oh my gosh Lips, I am so sorry. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
    Hang in there, you have such a big heart, I know you can handle this.

    imakin1

  • Lips and Froggy,I'm truly sorry to hear that. It's so hard to watch someone you care about go thru something like this again. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.

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